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Old Williamsonian Hockey Club

1st XI

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Captain : Barry Mackness 
2008

DATE

Opposition

Venue

Result

SEP 6

Tournament

F H - -
  13

-

- - - -
  20

Sutton Valence 1

F A 11:30 D 3-3
  27

Anchorians

F A 1:30 W 4-3
OCT 4

Eastbourne

L H 1:30 L 0-7
  11

Worthing

L A D 4-4
18

Old Bordenians

L H 1:30 W 4-0
  25

Tunbridge Wells

L A W 5-1
NOV 1

Blackheath

L A W 5-4
  2

Plymouth Uni [CUP]

C H 1:00 W 5-0
  8  Herne Bay L H 1:30 W 4-3
  15

Marden Russets

L A D 3-3
  22

Horsham

L H 1:30    
23

Henley [CUP]

C H 1:00
  29

BBHC

L A 2:00    
DEC 6

Kings College London

L H 1:30
13

Folkestone

L A
20

-

- -
2009
JAN 3

-

- -    
  10

-

- -    
  17

Eastbourne

L A 3:00    
  24

Worthing

L H 1:30    
  31

Old Bordenians

L A    
FEB 7

Tunbridge Wells

L H 1:30    
  14

Blackheath

L H 1:30    
  21

Herne Bay

L A 2:30    
  28

Marden Russets

L H 1:30    
MAR 7

Horsham

L A    
  14

BBHC

L H 1:30    
  21

Kings College London

L A    
  28

Folkestone

L H 1:30    
APR 4

-

- -    

To download fixture lists for this season click here.

Match Report 15-11-08

Marden              :     Old Williamsonians         3

This will be looked on as a point gained for OWs rather than 2 points lost. There were some off colour performances from individuals, some poor discipline, injury concerns and another poor start to a game, but once again a resilient streak was shown as OWs clawed back from 2-0 down at half time and 3-2 down to equalise in the last minute.

As one would expect of 2 teams in the top 5 of the league, this was a game where no quarter was going to be given and Marden certainly started the better of the 2 teams. They were first to everything, quick on the break and keen to impose themselves on OWs, who frankly, started poorly and compounded this by moaning at each other. Marden scored 2 goals early on and held the lead until half time, although OWs had at least 4 clear chances themselves.

A half time deficit is not an uncommon situation for OWs to be in. Simple points were made and instructions given and the team responded. James Gomme was injured and OWs started the second half with 10 players due to a yellow card, but undeterred, OWs fought their way back to 2-2 by midway through the second half. Barry Mackness hit the first, a reverse stick effort through the keeper's legs. Jeff Doust added the second from a short corner. Marden were then on the back foot, but OWs by this stage were effectively playing with 10 men as Barry Mackness had joined Gomme on the crock list. A poor defensive lapse allowed Marden to regain the lead with little more than 6 minutes left, but OWs refused to give up and with a minute left gained a final short corner which was switched to Kenny Mackness, who placed a delightful flick past the keeper into the far post to gain a point.

Jamie Moise won man of the match, mainly for playing in a number of positions and covering well for the injured player OWs carried for most of the second half.

OWs need to take the lessons of this game away with them. They almost lost a game through their own actions and in this tight league, it's something you simply cannot afford to do.

Team: Mold, Thompson, Gomme, Jefferies, Doust, Moise, Gray, Pentecost, Lee, Mackness K, Mackness B, Coomber.

Match Report 8-11-08

Old Williamsonians              :     Herne Bay         3

Another 3 points gained, but OWs made hard work of the victory, gifting goals to Herne Bay and missing around 5 or 6 open goals themselves. Still, a win is a win.

James Pentecost was the star of the show for OWs. He does 2 jobs in his gap year to save money to go to university (hopefully locally), he scored 2 goals with consummate ease and he enlisted the help of 2 muppets to burn the kitchen down cooking the teas after the game! His first goal (OWs 2nd) came via a quick break, a pass and return, a dribble around the keeper and a decisive finish into the goal. His 2nd (OWs 3rd) was a great run behind the Herne Bay defence and another pin point finish.

The other 2 goals were scored by Jeff Doust, the first goal a pass into the goal, demonstrating that placement rather than power is the best way to score. Doust's second goal which turned out to be the winner involved close control and a calm finish into the roof of the net. Doust's significant other contribution was to almost take off Stuart Gray's head with a flying stick as it slipped out of his hands striking a corner in the inclement conditions. Doust's 2 goals from the left back position got a mass debate going with the Willies to see if anyone could remember the last time a Willies left back had scored 2 goals in a league game. With OWs having a long history of having best left backs in the league, no one could remember this having happened before, not even by the great Gus Brady.

There are some theories knocking around as to why OWs were slightly off colour this week. The weather conditions were not great and lots of the team were suffering from colds and niggling injuries. The frustrations of the day led to more pressure and consequently more misses of open goals. The efforts of last week, in playing 2 high paced games may have taken their toll. However, the true explanation is simple and straightforward. Kenny HOTBOD Mackness and Chris Coomber were not playing and so the fun loving OWs were deprived of their 2 performing midgets and therefore not as happy as they usually are which translated itself in the performance on the pitch. Mackness was working although whether sitting on a toadstool by a pond dangling a fishing rod into the pond constitutes working we must leave the educated readers to decide. Coomber was not allowed to play as he had a birthday surprise organised for him. While both reasons may be considered unbelievable by some, one of the reasons is actually true.

No votes for man of the match or divot this week. It's a rollover for next week.

Team: Mold, Thompson, Gomme, Jefferies, Doust, Bage, Gray, Pentecost, Lee, Mackness B, Moise, Routledge A.

Match Report 2-11-08

Old Williamsonians              :     Plymouth University         0      [E.H.Trophy]

OWs progressed to the next round of the EH Trophy on Sunday after another solid performance and finished the game with 3 sets of brothers on the pitch and 6 players under 21. OWs started strongly and were 3-0 up after just nine minutes. Jeff Doust got things rolling with a short corner strike, Barry Mackness added a second and Jamie Moise mooched a third on the line. The vast hoards of OWs supporters were impressed by the way the team has developed, but also fair minded to the opposition, who, despite having a long journey home and obviously disappointed by their defeat, stayed and socialised following the game. A top bunch of men and a credit to their University. Wouldn't it be nice if all teams did that especially those with much shorter distances to travel back to their club?

3-0 then at half time and OWs added a fourth soon after the break. Kenny Mackness created the chance, taking on the defence, playing a lovely one two and shooting into an open goal......only for brother Barry to stop the ball on the line and then tap home, claiming the glory! This allowed OWs to make some changes, with Luke Butcher coming on and performing really well and for the last part of the game allowing Danny Routledge (16) and Ashley Pentecost (15) to make competitive debuts at this level. Kenny Mackness added a deserved fifth goal to round things up. The Mackness brothers were joined by James and Ashley Pentecost and Andy and Danny Routledge in giving OWs 3 sets of brothers in the 1st XI at one time for the first time in their history and showing that the OW youth policy remains strong.

James Gomme received 3 man of the match votes, just pipping Jamie Moise and Kenny Mackness to the award. Divot was shared between Andy Routledge, for his pants and Barry Mackness for the theft of a goal from his own brother. There should be a special mention to Graham Lee for forgetting his own age, although his travelling circus theme for MOM and Divot votes for Barry is genius and deserves praise of the highest order. The Gary Bage camouflage gag also looks to have some legs in it.

Special thanks to the girls in the kitchen for providing some lovely food afterwards and to all those who came and supported the side, even if some of you were gossiping and missed the first goal......

Team: Mold, Thompson, Gomme, Bage, Doust, Butcher, Moise, Gray, Lee, K.Mackness, B.Mackness, A.Routledge, D.Routledge, J.Pentecost, A.Pentecost.

[SEE PHOTOS FROM THE DAY BELOW, BENEATH MATCH REPORTS]

Match Report 1-11-08

Blackheath              :     Old Williamsonians         5

I have been asked to spice up the reports more following the recent fact based reports submitted. Cheer us up a bit in these colder darker credit crunch times they said. So here goes. Much like a Tottenham fan who has had to remain (thankfully) quiet at the start of the season, then suddenly crawls out of their shell now that Harry Houdini has strung a couple of results together and has started the usual Champions League here we come drivel, much of the following bears absolutely no resemblance to reality whatsoever.

I enjoyed a pleasant trip home with the Mackness brothers following the game on Saturday, with sensible conversation and sibling harmony......

Will the Medway News print any of these first 3 paragraphs? Doubtful.

It was a big game for a number of reasons on Saturday. Blackheath were unbeaten in the league, OWs have been climbing the table each week and Neil Thompson was up against his old club. After remembering to pick up Chris Mold, OWs finally arrived and while they were focused, Blackheath came out of the traps like a "loyal" Tottenham supporter out of their seat with 5 minutes of a game left. Within a minute of the start, the ball was in the OW net but no Blackheath player had touched the ball in the D so no goal. Immediately, OWs went up the other end and hit the post. The tone was set. Blackheath continued pounding Willies and were 2-0 up in no time at all. However, OWs have resolve this season and refused to panic, slowly working their way back into the game. They were rewarded with a Graham Lee drag flick finish to bring them back to 2-1. More to follow in the whole divot/backstabbers/no respect/got them where they are today paragraph later on in the report, but Lee's effort was compared in disparaging tones to Jeff Doust's drag flick against Worthing by a couple of jokers. Personally, I thought it was a marvellous effort, with pace and placement.

Unfortunately, Blackheath continued to batter Willies and restored a 2 goal lead by half time. 3-1.

The half time team talk was positive and as it turns out pretty much spot on. Blackheath had put so much effort into the first half that something was bound to give and the mantra was patience and OWs time would come, probably in the last 15 minutes of the game.

As the second half progressed OWs were getting the upper hand in key areas. James Pentecost and Stuart Gray were solid in the middle. James Gomme and Jamie Moise were outstanding down the right. OWs got the breakthrough they needed when Chris Coomber deflected the ball home. Disappointingly Blackheath immediately hit back to make it 4-2 with about 15 minutes left. Enter Barry Mackness who scored 2 quick goals from well worked short corners to bring the scores level, then stepped up to get his hat trick from the P spot after Chris Coomber had been fouled in the area. OWs took the lead for the first time and were strong enough to withstand some renewed pressure from Blackheath as Neil Thompson excellently marshalled the defence. A magnificent result against a very strong opposition.

Man of the match was a difficult choice as there were so many great individual performances in a real team effort. Divot was clearly some kind of conspiracy against Jeff Doust, made even worse by the fact that there were equally strong candidates. Barry Mackness "where do we turn off?" Sun in the Sands roundabout. "oh right, that's the one with the big pub on it isn't it? What's the pub called?" Sun in the Sands Barry. Chris Coomber - can't stand up. Jamie Moise - so busy getting his hair and smell right he was left behind at the ground and had to phone to get someone back to collect him. So what if you forget little things occasionally in your old age and wear cycling shorts inside out? Come back to me when you're late 30's and still doing the business in the 1st team I say.

I don't have a problem with Tottenham Hotspur really. Some of my mates are fans - Stu Gray, James Gomme, Stu Foster. It's just that they need to get a grip on reality. You don't see me talking a load of rubbish do you? Well, not at half time anyway!

Team: Mold, Thompson, Gomme, Jefferies, Doust, Moise, Coomber, Pentecost, Gray, Lee, Mackness K, Mackness B.


Action from the 5-0 win against Plymouth University on 2-11-08 (photos kindly supplied by Pete Wright);

The opening goal

Barry saves Kenny's shot

Barry makes sure!

Stuart searches for ball as Martin calls 'It's behind you'

Chris makes another routine stop

Winners!

 


Player Profiles

Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:



Speciality:
Chris Mold
Compo.
Goalkeeper


 

Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:

Speciality:
Gary Bage
The Monk.
Defender
"                            " (doesn't speak!)
The monk does not speak. The monk is concentrating only on the hockey. Up and down, down and up.
Sponsored silences.
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :

Summary:

Speciality:
Luke Jeffries
Goth.
Defender
"My mate's playing in a band and he's brilliant".
Reliable defender in the sense that he can always be relied upon to turn up late. Plays strange music to people that only come out after after dark.
(1) Musical taste - not
(2) Train timetables - not
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:





Speciality:
Neil Thompson

Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:


Speciality:
James Moise
Ashley Cole
Right Back
“Looked good coming up the back” “He played well”
Works the wings and plunges forward well, quickly develops a good relationship with whoever is in front of him!!!
Hair and make-up
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:


Speciality:
Stuey Gray
Stupid Gay, Will Young, 5 Bellies.
Midfield
"Boverd” “Cheers bitch”
Dirty fouling midfield assassin. Has terrible dress sense, and a crazy-eyed thousand-yard stare. Fat, bovine and frothing at the mouth, won the award for Most Consistently Styled Hair.
Yoyo dieting.
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:


Speciality:
Jeff Doust
One Leg, Two Chins.
Midfield
"Good draw lads" after beating the league leaders last season
Club superstar and legend, great all round pitch ability and liked by all...oh no, that's his Dad Terry!
Tooth trick, simple arithmetic (NOT).
 
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :

Summary:




Speciality:
James Pentecost
JEP, Son of God 1
Attacking midfielder
“My Dad's the Chairman, I can get James Gomme to do what ever I want”, “That was hard Dave”
I’ve never herd him say he likes women, or complain like Andy Stoute about lack of groin exercise. Does this one trick all the time where he always goes right, and even after the opposition states this throughout the game it continuously happens.
Making the most of his Dad's influence to win awards, going right.
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:


Speciality:
Graham Lee
Donkey Boy, Wayward Son.
Midfield
Size doesn't matter.......not!
A key exponent of the tripod formation, DB puts his success down to an oversize stick, but this midfield rock carries a heavy burden in the form of his huge conk, which sometimes causes him to overbalance and look silly. Complains that now his secret's out, umpires continually proffer their rings to check that his stick is within regulation size.
None required.
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:

 

 

Speciality:

Ken Mackness
All the gear, no idea,  De management
No where he’s rather useless.
"We need to have the square option, the diagonal option the forward option all the time." "Yea, follow me I know the way there."
I took him to a football match once - best seats in the house, right on halfway line, but he kept moaning and moaning until we moved behind the goal. This shut him up for a bit, but he shrugged his shoulders and sulked for the rest of the day.
Writing self glorifying profiles of himself that will never be published here!
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:


Speciality:
Chris Coomber Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :
Summary:


Speciality:
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :

Summary:


Speciality:
James Gomme
Gommy, Human Trafficmaster / Gom Gom.
Forward
"Ed, one *!^&*#ing day I will ~!%&ing run "!@^ing DGB!"
A tireless worker on the pitch and an ambassador off.....until you give him a couple of beers, then stand back as he lets rip! Planning take over of the Pentecost Empire. At 26, has already worn out the middle finger of his right hand!
Navigation, The wiggly finger trick.
Name :
Aliases :
Position :
Quote :


Summary :




Speciality:
Barry Mackness
Mop Head, Debbie, Bazzle.
Forward
(1) "Got a fag?" (2)"I've only ever missed 2...3...4...5 p-flicks in my entire career"
Able to glide through opposition, because of their fear of getting cut by his extensive facial jewellery, Mop Head is the flash player of the team. Sports a different hairstyle each week (I use the term 'style' loosely). Went round the corner in his Mitsubishi FTO so fast one day he left half the paintwork behind.
(1) Poncing, (2) Wearing his missus' clothes.